I’m still alive… Motherhood hasn’t killed me off

And to show you how horrible of a blogger I am, the following three paragraphs have been sitting patiently in blog land waiting to be finished… I’m guessing I woke up in the middle of the night for a feed 2 weeks ago and began writing after Baby C went back to sleep… So much has happened since then but I’ll let you read this portion and then update you on the rest.

{Post written about 2 weeks ago} Well, it’s been ages since I’ve updated and let you folks know about my wonderful motherhood journey thus far… As of today, Baby C is officially 12 weeks old! She rolled over this morning in honor of the festivities. She’s such a feisty little thing and she brings so much joy to C and I.

Today is also the day that I was supposed to head back to work… But… I’ve had my leave extended once again. I don’t ever want to go back! I want to be a SAHM. Shoot, I’ll even go the WAHM route if it means more time with my precious girl. I mean, wouldn’t you want to hang out with the kid who’s smiles melt your heart daily?!

But… It hasn’t all been roses and calla Lillie’s. There was a bit of postpartum in my journey. A little depression and a lot of anxiety! I mean, you are sent home with this whole life for real baby that can’t talk and tell you what’s wrong. Totally. Scary. Shit. Right. {End}

And I’ll pick up here assuming I can remember my train of thought…

How will you know which cry is which? Will I be a good mother? How does she know I’m her mommy? Despite working in a daycare and helping raise countless children, its like, you totally forget everything that you’ve learned about caring for kids once you initially have one of your own. But, I’m happy to report that things are smooth sailing now! Baby C and I have developed a schedule now… Or rather, she has put ME on a schedule!

She’s eating about every 3-3.5 during the day and about every 4-5 hours at night. Which is a much better stretch than that God awful every 2 hour bid that we had to endure in the beginning. So, bath time is 7:30 and regardless of how sleepy she is once she’s out of the bath, she typically doesn’t go down for the night until 10 or 11… If she does fall asleep after bath time, she typically wakes up in about an hour. Although, last night she went down around 9:30ish and didn’t stir until around 1ish. MaMa C handed her to me and I fed her. She went back down immediately and woke again around 4:45-5 for another bottle. She are and went back to sleep. I just finished her morning feed and she’s down again. She typically doesn’t wake for the day until around 9:30-10. Which by no means is a problem for me. Sometimes, I’ll lay back down with her… Other times, I’ll stay up and enjoy the peace. I can only gather that her schedule and sleep patterns will become more defined as she gets older.

And no, I’m not back to work yet. Yes, I’ve had my leave extended once again! MaMa C and I have both come to terms with the fact that neither of us wants me to go back to work. We did take a road trip this pass weekend and left Baby C with her Gamma overnight, which was our first time leaving her. I cried the entire drive to drop her off but we all did well. Despite the fact that Gamma didn’t get much rest because C refused to sleep. She didn’t cry but she did talk Gamma to death. Lol. So, even though we’ve jumped the hurdle of someone else keeping her, we both feel like no one will take care of her needs during the day like I will. This has led to me currently getting out house ready for me to apply to run a family daycare in our home. I’m over the hills ecstatic. I’ve wanted to do this for years and have always let it fall by the wayside. Well, not this time! Staying home with Baby C is my sheer motivation! That and all of the flack that my job has given me while I’ve been out.

Other things that have been going on with us: MaMa C’s hunt for a new job and the TTC journey of #2 on the horizon but I feel like this post is long enough so I’ll spare you and write about that in another post.

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